i have been under the weather lately.....

in fact, that's such an understatement that i'd be remiss if i didn't say i was snow-plowed under for the last three weeks....what started off innocently enough as a funk which always grows into a depression and worsens from there mentally was made all the more jolly by what could only have been considered the mother of all crohn's disease attacks....oddly enough, i have in recent weeks (now months) been scheduled for 2 full g.i. series, an m.r.i. of my brain, a ct scan of my abdominal cavity, an mri of my abdominal cavity, a pet scan of my full body and extensive bloodwork.....one test i missed, another i skipped, the third (and of course the most ghastly and invasive of them all,) scheduled for 8am the day immediately after my birthday (way to make any birthday a night to celebrate - besides organized events, disorganized chaos, and the full-on attack of the go-lightly --who the hell had the nerve to name that shit "go-lightly"....ironic? i think not....more like unfortunate!) so i show up for the full on g.i. series after doing my duty as much as a man can do with as little of the go lightly as one can ingest....only to be delayed....and delayed....and delayed and then finally cancelled....my blood pressure skyrocketed and they weren't able to put me under for the tests....good gosh damn, man! demerol was the only reason i signed up for the go-lightly experience in the first place....not only did i have to drink a vile gallon of that toxic goo, but i had to spend a solid 15 hours expelling toxic poo....only to find out that all the inuendo (or my endo as the case was scheduled to be....) was merely voodoo that you do, but that i don't do so well....thus, one was accomplished back in october, inconclusively....now the late november one didn't happen and despite my bitching and moaning and farting and passing all things animal, vegetable, mineral and other, i am now required to sign up for the voodoo you do and the i do poodoo testing all over again....riddle me this....am i amused?

not a single iota.....